Breaded Pork Chops, Lima Beans, & Fettucine Alfredo

So I want to do another bacon recipe for Mike.

But the only bacon recipe left? BLT. And no, I’m not bothering with that. If you don’t know how to make that, you fail.

So I’m gonna do a recipe for myself. My birthday’s this week anyways.

I should make a cake, but my birthday’s Wednesday which means I can spread out the cooking to two weekends.

I do have a traditional birthday dinner. Shake and Bake porkchops, lima beans, and angel hair pasta with alfredo sauce. I’ve liked this since I can remember. Weird, right? What little kid likes pork chops?

Anyways, I’m going to do what I can from this.

Breaded Pork Chops

Joy of Cooking really says this for the recipe: Prepare Breaded Veal Cutlets, substituting pork chops.

So I’m going to do the whole substitution for you! ooh. ahh.

Ingredients

4 pork loin chops

½ c flour

2 c bread crumbs (if you can use fresh, go for it. But that’s so much bread it is actually worth it to buy canned crumbs.)

2 eggs

1 tbsp milk

3 tbsp vegetable oil

Salt and pepper

Season the pork chops with salt and pepper.

Spread the flour on a plate, and the bread crumbs on another plate.

Beat the eggs and the milk together in a bowl.

Heat the oil in a skillet over medium-high heat.

One or two at a time, as many will fit in the skillet at once, prepare the pork chops. Coat them in the flour first, then dip in the egg/milk mixture, and then coat with the bread crumbs. Cook in the skillet for 3 to 4 minutes each side, until brown and crunchy.

Drain on paper towels before serving.

Lima Beans

Okay, I doubt you’ll find fresh lima beans and actually want to take the time to cook them, so here’s a way different recipe.

Ingredients

1 package frozen lima beans (as much as you want)

2 tbsp butter

1 tbsp lemon juice

1 tsp dried parsley.

Thaw the lima beans by microwaving them in a bowl with some water.

Stir in the butter, lemon juice, and parsley until the butter has melted.

Note: if you don’t like the taste of lemon too much, use less juice. That much is only a suggestion here.

Fettuccine Alfredo

Because angel hair pasta is traditional for me, that’s what I’ll be using. You can substitute whatever pasta you want.

Ingredients

1 pound angel hair pasta

½ c butter

1 c heavy cream

1 c grated Parmesan cheese

Salt and pepper

Cook the pasta in a large pot of boiling water (4-6 quarts, with a pinch of salt to keep the pasta from sticking) until it is tender. The pasta package will give you guidelines on the time.

Meanwhile, in a skillet, melt the butter over medium heat. When the pasta is done, drain it and add it to the skillet—or add the butter to the pasta if your skillet isn’t big enough.

Add the cream, Parmesan, and salt and pepper. Toss it all together over low heat.

Notes: When I made this, I accidentally added only ½ cup of cream and ¾ cup of Parmesan. It was still delicious, just with a more subtle flavor. Try this if you’re on a diet and want lower fat in this dish. 

also, is anyone reading this? Please comment if you are, I'm feeling invisible here.

Sauteed Apples With Bacon

This week, my boyfriend and I will be celebrating our anniversary. I chose this week’s recipe in his honor.

He likes bacon.

There are few recipes for bacon, most of the bacon entries are different methods of cooking it.

So I’m going to go with Sautéed Apples With Bacon. This sounds so weird, but it’s really really good. It’s best as a breakfast dish or a snack.

Ingredients

4 large apples

8 slices bacon (make sure they’re raw, not just cooked bacon you steal from the cafeteria)

2 to 4 tbsp sugar

Peel and core the apples, then cut them into ¾ inch wedges.

Cook the bacon in a skillet over medium heat until brown and crispy.

Remove the bacon to a plate lined with paper towels. Pour all but 2-3 tablespoons of the grease out of the skillet.

Add the apples to the bacon grease, putting the skillet back over medium heat. Cook the apples until they start to get tender and slightly brown.

Sprinkle the apples with sugar, and arrange them on the plate with the bacon.

Notes:

Make sure your apples are firm-fleshed. Granny Smiths are always good. My favorite is Golden Delicious, they’re a bit sweeter.

Spicy Maple-Roasted Quail

So, it’s Valentine’s Day today. That means one more recipe from the Valentine’s list.

Spicy Maple-Roasted Quail

This serves 4-8 people. You can half it to serve less, or plan on having leftovers.

And we’re not using quail. Chicken’s way cheaper. If you can afford to buy 8 quails, go ahead, but I’m assuming you’re not doing that.

Ingredients

One whole chicken (about 4.5-5 pounds) or 8-10 chicken breasts (these can be boneless if you prefer to do less preparation) or 2 Cornish game hens

¼ cup maple syrup (“maple flavor” will work. Just won’t taste good.)

¼ cup soy sauce

2 tbsp red wine vinegar

2 tbsp chili-garlic paste (if you can find it, that’s sometimes hard—to make some yourself, mix 2 tbsp tomato paste, 1 tsp Tabasco, and 1 tsp garlic powder)

8 cloves garlic, chopped finely (a clove is not the whole thing. A clove is one of the little bits inside. One head of garlic will easily have 8 cloves. If you’re unsure, Google it.)

¼ tsp cinnamon

¼ tsp pepper

Salt and pepper to taste

If you have a whole bird, remove the innards. Giblets (if there are any) will be in a bag you can just pull out. Pop out the kidneys—they are just at the opening in the back, and you should easily be able to just pop them out.

Sprinkle the chicken with the salt and pepper.

Combine in a bowl the syrup, soy sauce, vinegar, paste, garlic, cinnamon, and pepper. Place the chicken in this mixture and coat it.

Marinate the chicken in the mixture for 4-8 hours in the refrigerator.

Preheat the oven to 475°.

Drain the chicken, but keep the extra marinade. Place the chicken in a casserole dish or roasting pan. Lacking either of those, you can form some aluminum foil into a makeshift one. You just want it to be in a large pan with deep sides.

Roast in the oven for 10 minutes, and then lower the temperature to 400°.

Roast for a little over an hour (65 minutes plus 10 minutes per every pound over 3.5), or until you cut into the chicken and the flesh is white. As it’s roasting, you’ll want to baste it twice—pour some of the extra marinade over the chicken.

Remove from oven, cover loosely with aluminum foil, and let sit 5 minutes before serving.

Note: this could turn out really tender. When I made it, the bones literally just slid out of the meat. (very nice, as I hate eating meat off the bone.)

Your roasting time will vary based on what kind of meat you have. Best idea, Google it if you’re unsure.

Dipped Chocolate Truffles

What’s the one thing every girl wants on Valentine’s Day? Flowers and chocolate.

This isn’t Joy of Gardening, so you’re on your own with the flowers. But I can help you make some kick-ass chocolates.

Dipped Chocolate Truffles

This recipe will, again, be combining two recipes. The other recipe is Microwave Chocolate Truffle Centers.

Also, this recipe makes over 50 pieces of chocolate. Feel free to half it if that’s too much.

Ingredients

1 pound plus 10 oz bittersweet or semisweet chocolate (don’t buy a chocolate bar, get this from the baking aisle of the grocery store. Each square of that chocolate is exactly 1 oz, so it’s easy to measure)

¾ cup heavy cream

¼ unsalted butter

~1 cup powdered sugar

Chop 10 oz of the chocolate and put them in a microwavable bowl with the cream.

Microwave the mixture in 30 second increments, stirring between, until completely smooth.

Add in the butter and stir until completely melted.

Cool it to room temperature, then move it to the fridge for 3-4 hours, until it is cold to the touch.

Cover a baking sheet with wax paper or parchment paper.

Remove the chocolate from the fridge and roll it into ¾ inch balls. If it is too cold to be malleable, let it heat to room temperature. Use the powdered sugar to coat each ball before rolling to prevent your hands from being covered in chocolate.

Cover the sheet loosely with plastic wrap and set it in the freezer as you make the coating.

Melt the other pound of chocolate in a double boiler (you can make one of these with a metal bowl over a pot of boiling water). While it’s still hot, take the centers from the freezer. If you have multiple batches, only take one batch from the freezer at a time.

Dip the centers into the melted chocolate using a fork and set them aside to cool. Ideally, you want them on a mesh rack so the excess chocolate can drip off, but they’ll taste just as if you cool them on parchment or wax paper. They just won’t be as pretty.

Do not use paper towels. The paper will tear and stick to the chocolate.

When all the chocolates are coated, move them back to the baking sheets and put them in the fridge for another 20 minutes so they set.

These can be stored in an airtight container separated by wax or parchment paper. In the fridge for 3 weeks or the freezer for 2 months, but you’re probably going to give them to your significant other right away, so don’t worry about that.

Notes: this is a difficult recipe. Making chocolate usually is. But I promise you it’ll taste delicious no matter what, your main difficulties will only be with making it look nice. Just be patient with it and if something isn’t working quite right, try your best to fix it.